Weekly Round Up Dedicated To Yvonne
This week has been such a sad week for the blogosphere as we joined with our friend Yvonne in her recent loss. There are many of us who can identify with what she calls the sharp stone of the physical pain of loss and I ache for her and for all of us who feel that pain. Yet even at this time of grief and shock, Yvonne’s eloquent writing shines through, not just in her remarkable blog, but she also took the time to leave this beautiful comment below, My wish is that her words find resonance with whomever of you are suffering right now for whatever reason, and that you will always find a soft place to fall and loving arms to hold you in our virtual world.
You surely know your blog has become a soft place to fall for so many of us, so may friends that care are right here in this space. This post which has sent so much support my way leaves me quite undone.There are millions of words and not one of them works to express the way I’m feeling, but I want you to know that every time I visit my own corner of the blogosphere and find such warmth and humanity from people I may never meet, I feel a little less frightened.
Yvonne writes of how surreal things feel to her and that is a familiar feeling to anyone who is bereaved – the fact that the world carries on turning and people go about their lives as if the world (our world) hasn’t ended. And yet the world turns and we do. In the midst of grief you think things will never be normal again, and in many ways they won’t, but you will find a new normal. In this way the cancer experience we share is also like a death. It is only in looking to others who have come through such an experience, we can have the hope that things do get better; that in time, the pain eases, and that we will find a new way to be in the world. At these times I turn to one of my favorite writers for comfort:
You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly – that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp. ~ Anne Lamott
Although I intended to do a full weekly round-up today, I find myself hesitating when I think of how time and normality have been suspended in Yvonne’s world, so I hope you will understand if this week’s round-up is solely dedicated to her.
Yours with much love
Such beautiful words, Marie. The quotes are so healing, including Yvonne’s comment. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about the blogosphere, we are fully capable of hugging each other from a distance. The love and caring we share is real. I can’t even imagine the empty hole that’s left in one’s heart after losing a spouse. We all wrap our arms around Yvonne in the hope it helps even a little to carry her through the days ahead.
And I include you in this dedication too Eileen. I know the deep pain of losing a mother and I am holding you in my thoughts at this time also xxx
This is beautiful and so appropriate Marie – to bring us together and wrap Yvonne, her daughter and family in this virtual but so real hug, as Eileen says. The eloquence and heartache of Yvonne’s post show so clearly what a very special person she is to us all and your own words and thoughtfulness shine light at a time when darkness encroaches.
Yvonne, you are in my thoughts continuously. Sending you love and holding you close.
Thanks for dedicating this to Yvonne who has been in my heart since I heard. And her daughter too. If our love gives her strength and feel less afraid if so grateful to you for capturing it here. I hope Yvonne’s wonderful talent of writing helps her gets through each day just now. We’ve all faced grief but I haven’t faced this one. I should have learned by now to stop making sense of iwhat life throws at us all but somehow I’m back there again thinking how unfair it is. But it’s not about fairness, I know. Love is what helps us get through. I’m proud to be part of this warm community that has so much to give. Thanks to Marie and all of you and Yvonne know you are in our hearts. Xxx
Beautiful, moving words, Marie. Thank you so much for sharing them. Blessings and peace to all. Debbie
You chose wisely & beautifully in dedicating this round-up to Yvonne, Marie. And, in fact, it is a dedication to us all. Our hearts are all connected. xoxo, Kathi
A beautiful gesture, Marie. Thank you. Yvonne, you are in our thoughts and in our hearts.
Great choice, Marie. That sharp stone of loss affects us all, even when it’s from afar and piercing one of our own in the blogosphere.
Well done, Marie. The quote you shared is so very right.
you’ve given us a place to gather, a place where we can embrace our beautiful Yvonne and her lovely daughter, Sophe, and let them know our hearts are filled with love and compassion and hopefulness for them in such dark days of loss. though the yearning of those who love one another enough to be willing to take on their pain and bear it for them is not possible, the expressions of just how much we think of them, of how they are kept close to our hearts, and that we are keeping a vigil for them marked with so much empathy and love and hope to help sustain them is something that we can offer, and you have that made possible with your dedication of this post to Yvonne. thank you so much for your beautiful words and the quotes you cited. and as kathi said above, “,,,our hearts are all connected…” so true, and so fortunate for all of us – in good times and in those that are heart wrenching.
much love and light to Yvonne, to Sophie, and to you, Marie,
Beautifully said Marie.
Marie this is just beautiful. Thank you. Sending blessings and thoughts with love and light to Yvonne and the rest of her family, you and your family, and all of us who are connected via the writings and thoughts expressed… We are indeed all connected….Hugs and xoxo – Susan
Dear Marie, I have shared this poem in Yvonne’s comment area, but want to post it here on your page dedicated to her, too. I wrote it to commemorate a friend of mine who died from ovarian cancer and I would like to honor her also.
It was her time to go, they said.
She’s in a better place, they said.
How could it be her time to go?
How could Elsewhere possibly
be better than Here?
Laura and Charles are here
Laura is only thirteen years old
All of us are here, longing for her
needing that indomitable spirit
to confront us
to challenge us
to comfort us
No, I can’t believe
it was her time to go…
But I do know
that wherever she is
the skies are ablaze
with the brilliance
of her entry…
Copyright Lois Tschetter Hjelmstad
oh, mercy, Lois
I cannot and do not want to consider that Elsewhere could possibly be better than Here. Thank you for understanding so completely how this is for me, for Sophie, for your friend.
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