And still your wonderful comments keep coming. I am so grateful to each and every one of you. Your collective wisdom and compassion, which I always knew to be there, has lifted me up and carried me this past weekend.
I am learning so much through this experience. Above all, I am learning that fighting against the reality of what is will just exhaust you and get you nowhere. I love what Sighle had to say in her comment
I know you also love Pema Chodron, and when I feel a resistance to “what is” (which is only in the now ) I think of her saying; “Now I have enough compassion to enjoy all that is agreeable in my life, and all that is disagreeable in my life”
I am not sure I am quite ready to enjoy what is disagreeable, but I really do get what Sighle is saying here – we must accept the reality of what is in our lives and that perhaps some of our suffering comes from our expectation that things should be different and of course not living in the reality of the present moment. Again Pema has this to say:
The source of all wakefulness, the source of all kindness and compassion, the source of all wisdom, is in each second of time. Anything that has us looking ahead is missing the point
As Debbie says
We all must acknowledge and accept that sadness is going to be a part of our lives and when it comes allow it, accept it as much as we can so we can truly feel it.
Again this reminds me of an interview with Pema, where she said that this is the first noble truth – you are willing to see suffering as suffering.
And so what do we do with this suffering? Again, I am staying with what Pema has to say:
The fundamental question is not whether there is or isn’t suffering. It is how we work with suffering so that it leads to awakening the heart and going beyond the habitual views and actions that perpetuate suffering. How do we actually use suffering so that it transforms our being and that of those that we come in contact with? How can we stop running from pain and reacting against it in ways that destroy us as well as others? This is a message that people can hear, but they have to hear it a lot, and with great heart, and from people who really care, not from somebody who is just passing through to make a few dollars…
I am trying to practise an unconditional embrace of what is right now, this suffering, this pain – to embrace it all. I do believe that grief if we stay open to it is a way to connect us to our deepest self. When we are brave enough to feel the pain of loss, we open ourselves up to so much more. It’s a difficult and challenging practice to keep your heart and mind open to everything that comes your way but your wisdom and compassion have gone a long way towards helping me and for that I am truly grateful.
And because I know that you speak from your own deep place of suffering and loss too your words have a greater power to heal and transform than any self-help book ever could. So never underestimate the power of your words to heal.
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around “~ Leo Buscaglia
Thank you for turning things around for me x
What a lovely post x
Your posts continually amaze me. Your openness and honesty are incredible. You will never really know how many people you are touching, and helping with your words.
I am reading a book right now and when I read this one story, it reminded me of your post the other day.
“Over and over, I heard similar sentiments from the people who supported me during those hard days. One very wise man told me, ‘You are not doing nothing. Being fully open to your grief may be the hardest work you will ever do.'”
The author goes on to say,
“I have been surprised to learn that there is incredible freedom that comes from facing one’s worst fear and walking away whole. I believe there is strength in surrender.”
While I understand that not all of us walk away whole, we do learn from the experiences we are faced with.
There is not one day that I have come to your blog that I have not walked away learning something, not only about you the author, the person, but also about myself. I continue to send prayers and best wishes your way.
Oh Patty – what a wonderful comment – thank you xxx
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I’ve nothing wise to say, just xx
There’s plenty of wisdom in that xxx
Marie, your transparency in the good time and the challenging times is one of the things I most appreciate about you. That is why we travel the world with people and not alone. When one of us falls down the other one picks the other one up. I am glad to travel with you as you have picked me up so many times!
At the same time as we travel this wonderful journey of life I believe each person we encounter shapes us to what we are yet becoming. You certainly have impacted me 🙂
I want to encourage you not to give up your dream. Some way, some how (and mind you it can come in away we least expect it) I still believe that our God is a mighty big God and I still say nothing is impossible with him. Hugs, hugs and more hugs!
A beautiful post Marie and I am glad that something I said in my comment resonated with you. I am in a place where I have been thinking very much about life, the journey and all the ups and downs. And as I quoted in one of my posts a while back from Thomas Moore, I have been thinking about the..”bittersweet rhythm of an engaged life”.
Instead of fighting against this rhythm I am trying to accept it, learn from it, grow in it, dance with it, and find myself in it. It is giving me some sense of peace that I have been lacking. I am not completely at peace mind you..many ups and downs still, but I feel as if I am ‘on to something’ that is slowly become more and more clear to me.
You are constantly in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Debbie xxx
Thanks for sharing so openly and for your empathy to us metastatic survivors. Sometimes people are afraid to share their struggles with me, saying “Oh, my problems are nothing compared to yours.” That’s just nonsense.
We are all bonded together when we share vulnerable parts of ourselves. It is what makes us human and real. Knowing that others care helps heal the pain. We are all connected.
Another beautiful post. I have been been reading your posts from the past few days and together they add up to a wisdom we can all learn from. Thank you x
I really do hope you know what a powerful influence you have been in so many of our lives. I know I have learned so much from your thoughtful posts over the past year since first starting to read your blog.
Such a wonderful reflection on compassion not just for others but for ourselves too – I just loved it!
Just when I think you can’t get any better with your posts, I read something like this – wonderful writing, wonderful teachings – thank you for sharing it with us.