Finding meaning in cancer
Recently I came across an abstract entitled, Resolution of spiritual disequilibrium by women newly diagnosed with breast cancer. . The purpose of the study which was published in the journal Oncol Nurs Forum in 2004 was to describe the experience of restoring and maintaining spiritual equilibrium over a 14-month period by women newly diagnosed with breast cancer.
The study found that spiritual disequilibrium characteristics, as described in several studies of women with breast cancer, were fear of dying and a sense of aloneness in a struggle to maintain self-identity. Disequilibrium triggered all participants to reach outwardly for information and support from other people and faith resources and to reach inwardly to examine life values.
Shortly after diagnosis, and continuing throughout the study period, most participants also reached outwardly to support others and conduct breast cancer advocacy work.
The study concludes that resolving spiritual disequilibrium for women with newly diagnosed breast cancer means restoring a sense of connection to self, others, and/or a higher power. Self-transcendence views and behaviors evolving over time help women to restore their sense of connectedness, maintain hope for a future, and find renewed purpose and meaning.
An initial breast cancer diagnosis may be associated with spiritual disequilibrium that can be as problematic as the physical effects of cancer and cancer treatment. Women restore equilibrium through resolving their sense of disconnectedness and regaining a positive self-identity.
How we do this differs from woman to woman, but I feel it is a crucial part of our recovery process. While many of us were lucky enough to avail of the opportunities to do this in cancer support centres, for some of us, it is a process that will continue long past our treatment has ended.
Source: PubMed
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I find the pieces you post on your blog very informative – they really speak to me and my own experience of breast cancer – I am one year down the road but still struggling with issues of who I am now and trying to make sense of the whole experience.
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Thanks so much for highlighting this. I feel less alone now that I know others have experienced these feelings too.
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Spiritual disequilibrium is an excellent way to describe how I have been feeling since my cancer treatment ended. Good to know I am not alone in this.
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I find this part of the study most interesting: “Shortly after diagnosis, and continuing throughout the study period, most participants also reached outwardly to support others and conduct breast cancer advocacy work.”, as it reflects reality for me too – it is in reaching out to others that I found the most meaning in my own cancer experience too.
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Like Daniella, I too found a greater meaning and resolution for myself in helping others and reaching out to them, not so much during my treatment, but in the months following the end of treatment, when I felt even more of this spiritual disequlibrium
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the study speaks of newly diagnosed patients, but I honestly felt more of a sense of disequilbrium, after my treatment had ended!
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excellent post
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What great relief to realize that the struggles I’ve faced in wrapping my head and heart around my brush with breast cancer aren’t foreign to others. I agree with all those who attest to the disequilibrium being greater and more pronounced AFTER treatment. For me, I was so focused on getting through treatment that I put all the emotional “junk” that goes with the diagnosis on the sidelines. Once you get off the field and sit on the bench of recovery, all that “junk” is waiting for you to address it! Enjoyed this post very much.
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