Only kindness makes sense anymore
Yesterday I listened to a radio interview with Dr Tony Bates in which he spoke about depression. At the end of the interview, he read a poem on kindness and it made me think about all the compassion and kindness that I am grateful to have been the recipient of lately and how in the words of the poet, in the midst of life’s tragedies, “it is only kindness that makes sense anymore”.
Kindness
Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.
Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to mail letters and
purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.
Naomi Shihab Nye
from The Words Under the Words: Selected Poems
Such a beautiful poem – moved me to tears.
LikeLike
Naomi Nye is one of my favorite poets – I loved what she says about poetry
“I have always loved the gaps, the spaces between things, as much as the things. I love staring, pondering, mulling, puttering. I love the times when someone or something is late—there’s that rich possibility of noticing more, in the meantime…Poetry calls us to pause. There is so much we overlook, while the abundance around us continues to shimmer, on its own.”
LikeLike
Actually Carla, that quote ties in very nicely with Tony Bates’ interview yesterday when he talked about cultivating mindfulness (great quote!)
LikeLike
I listened to this interview on Marian Finucance yesterday and thought he was wonderful. I was thrilled to see the poem here this morning again as I too found it very moving.
LikeLike
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
These lines are so true – we cannot show true compassion unless we have experienced deep pain and sorrow ourselves.
LikeLike
One of my favorite poems ever. I kept it on my dresser for my three years of seminary, which included two after my son died, and was just thinking the other day that I need to hang it up in my study in my church.
LikeLike
Thanks so much for your comment Robin – yesterday was my first time hearing this poem, and I already know it will become one of my all time favorites. So sorry to read of the loss of your son…you surely know “sorrow as the deepest thing”
LikeLike
Well, Iarla – I’m not usually one for poetry, but that really is an incredible piece of writing. Has really caught my attention. Going to ponder on it for a while…… xxx
LikeLike
oooh a comment from iarla..am beyond excited 🙂 I have found such comfort in poetry lately…watch out..it’s my new mission..to share its healing power..
LikeLike
What a beautiful poem! The line about “Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside, you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing” reminds me so much of one of my favorite quotes by Kahlil Gibran: ““The deeper that sorrow carves into your being,the more joy you can contain.” It’s always seemed like the epitome of learning the hard way, but once learned, it’s so true. Thanks for sharing, Marie. xo
LikeLike
Those are the two lines which really stood out for me too Nancy – and I love the quote you shared – thank you!
LikeLike
I love Naomi Shihab Nye but did not know this poem. Thank you so much for sharing! Couldn’t agree more with her and with you. It also made me remember a favorite quote from Henri Amiel: “Life is short, and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind!” xox
LikeLike
It’s my first introduction to her Jackie, but what a voice! Thanks for sharing the wondering Amiel quote too – I love it!
LikeLike
Thanks for this Marie. You say, “In the midst of life’s tragedies, it’s only kindness that makes sense anymore.”
Your words so speak to me as much as the poem you posted. I hope this doesn’t offend anyone, but I have really questioned the whole life after death thing lately, and as much as I want to believe in it, can’t see or feel or hear anything that makes it make sense to me, even though I so wish for it, especially since recent loss of my dad. But kindness is tangible. You can see and feel it in your heart and psyche. So you know it’s real and it touches you when you need it most. LIke you said, it’s the one thing that makes sense in the midst of tragedy.
LikeLike
Oh Rachel, I really do get what you are saying…must e-mail you privately later this week. M. x
LikeLike
Beautiful poem……and very true….unfortunately. Thank you for bringing it to me. ❤
LikeLike
Thanks for the comment Nancy
LikeLike
My goodness Marie, how inciteful. Beautiful writing, but quite terrifying too in that unlike many, I’ve yet to experience that sense of loss.
LikeLike
Thank you Dee
LikeLike
What an inexpressibly beautiful poem! It so resonated with me, each sweet word. How I could be like that Indian on the side of the road. I think I have been that Indian at times. Thank you so much for sharing this.
XOXO,
Jan
LikeLike
Oh I just knew you’d love it as much as I did Jan x
LikeLike
Oh, this is so, so true. The moments of kindness I most remember are those that were delivered in a moment when I was enduring the worst of life’s cruelty. I have never forgotten them, and have never taken for granted ever again how much it means to be kind in return. It means everything.
Dear Marie, thank you for sharing this.
LikeLike
It truly does Kathi x
LikeLike
Although I typically don’t read poetry, I have read and reread this poem throughout today…letting the truth of the words sink in. I wonder why it is we have to experience the deepest sorrow before we can truely appreciate the kindness? Especially as I have found the lines of this poem so true. For many it doesn’t make sense, but it was in the depths of the darkness that I learned to trust in God. Thank you for sharing this poem and I look forward to reading more…
LikeLike
I am so happy that this poem resonated so deeply with you Kim. I never used to be a lover or reader of poetry, but over the past year, I have found incredible solace in it..expect to see lots more poetry on JBBC in 2012!
LikeLike
Came back a second day to read this gorgeous poem – found it so moving
LikeLike
Sometimes the hardest part is being kind to ourselves don’t you think?
LikeLike
Oh yes Nancy.. I do!
LikeLike
AWESOME, TRUE AND I STAND AS A WITNESS
LikeLike
Very happy to hear that
LikeLike
This poem really speaks to me. It’s so true: kindness is formed partially by having adversity in life. It reminds me of a song, “Hands,” by the musical artist Jewel:
If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we’re all OK
And not to worry ’cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won’t be made useless
I won’t be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear
My hands are small, I know
But they’re not yours, they are my own
But they’re not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
Poverty stole your golden shoes
It didn’t steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn’t ever after
We’ll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what’s right
‘Cause where there’s a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing
My hands are small I know
But they’re not yours, they are my own
But they’re not yours, they are my own
I am never broken
In the end only kindness matters
In the end only kindness matters
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
My hands are small I know
But they’re not yours, they are my own
But they’re not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
My hands are small I know
But they’re not yours, they are my own
But they’re not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
We are never broken
We are God’s eyes
God’s hands
God’s mind
We are God’s eyes
God’s hands
God’s heart
We are God’s eyes
God’s hands
God’s eyes
We are God’s hands
We are God’s hands
LikeLike
This is wonderful Beth – thank you so much for sharing it with us – just perfect!
LikeLike
Delighted to find the poem ‘Kindness’ on your blog. It is food for the journey. your blog is inspiring as are those who respond to it. Thank you, Mimi
LikeLike
What a lovely comment Mimi, thank you so much for your own kindness x
LikeLike
From Gods lips to her pen- this is sublime, spiritual realism.
LikeLike
I am so glad you like it as much as I do Somnath – it is such a powerful poem
LikeLike
That is an incredible poem!
I have always written poetry to cope with the hard things in life. When we write poetry, we distill an experience down to its essence. Haiku is especially potent.
I’d like to share one of my own favorite haiku with you. I wrote it for a beautiful woman whom I met in Ohio, whose story appears in the Afterword of Fine Black Lines. A true mover and shaker, she died while in her 40s. I’ll always miss her. Here is the haiku:
Arrow of your pain
pierced my sad and breaking heart–
we are blood sisters
LikeLike
Oh Lois – that is just stunning! Thank you so very much for sharing this haiku. I am really moved by it.
LikeLike
Pingback: What Robin Williams Death Teaches Us | Journeying Beyond Breast Cancer