Oh mama! It’s mammogram time
I spent this weekend busy designing the website for my new business venture, and as always happens, when it comes to what I am passionate about, I became completely lost in the activity. It’s such a wonderful distraction when you find your passion as I have when it comes to online marketing and social media, but there comes a time when you have to stop and face what you’ve been successfully avoiding.
It’s getting dark outside as I type these words and I am alone in the house and my thoughts are now starting to turn to tomorrow morning and my annual mammogram. Conveniently mine rolls around each year on the anniversary of my first ever mammogram (and what a shock that one was) – the one that first alerted me to “the lump”. Despite interacting on a daily basis with the online BC brigade, I rarely worry about a recurrence. I feel devastated when I hear of someone whose cancer has recurred and I know that their story could so easily be mine too, but I can’t live my life thinking that it’s round the corner, lurking in the dark, ready to pounce on me again.
Except on nights like these…
I just mentioned to my husband on the telephone right now that I am feeling nervous about tomorrow and his answer?” Sure you’ve nothing to worry about, hasn’t it been clear for the past six years.” Thanks dear. Oh and another thing…if men had to have a manogram, would he be so flippant? Yes guys – it really does hurt!
Sorry you are on your own and feeling anxious and I won’t be so flippant as to say you’ll be alright .. but you’ll be fine no matter what Marie xxx
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LOL! I laughed out loud at both those cartoons..esp the last one 🙂
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Although that first cartoon made me smile, it also made me a little sad – the cartoonist has caught the shocked vulnerability of any of us who has undergone this procedure, knowing in our hearts, that the news won’t be good.
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Good luck tomorrow x
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I just went through the exact same thing last week. It’s impossible to step back into that room without a sense of deja vu and anxiety. Add to that the pain of being crushed between two panes of glass. I completely understand and I’m with you in spirit.
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You get it! I feel less alone now – thank you x
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All the best for tomorrow, Marie. I’ll be thinking of you xxxx
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thanks xx
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The cartoons are amusing and I think you’re right if men had to have all these tests… well I won’t even finish that statment!
Good luck tomorrow and also with your new venture!
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I wouldn’t normally do the male bashing thing…but when husband didn’t get it and then I saw this cartoon..well I just couldn’t help myself!
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Oh, I’ve seen that penisogram cartoon before. It just CRACKED ME UP, and did again when I opened up to this post. Hope all goes well for you Marie (if you havent’ had the infamous mammogram yet?) Mammograms don’t bother me (maybe because they missed my lump twice, and so I take the results only so seriously – have nothing negative in the way of finding cancer to associate with them in my personal experience.) For some reason, whenever I go in to the onc for tumor makers I start to get nervous. The every three month doc visit just does that. Enjoying ur blog lots. Am looking forward to your business venture going live so we can check it out. 🙂
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good luck marie, after it’s all over and all is fine, go have a big chocolate cupcake…fingers crossed….
Lauren
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oooh I will! Any excuse 🙂
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Oh Marie,
I so get the going on with life and than something come alongs to remind us that the chance of recurrance is still lurking in the back of our brains. Your sisters get it! Please remember we are holding your hand as you walk in the mammogram room. You are an inspiration and a blessing to us all! Sending prayers your way for peace of mind and celebration of healthy breasts.
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That helps me soooo much Kim…carrying you all with me this morning
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Ah I can relate to that feeling Marie, sending good wishes for B9!!!!
Tricia xx
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Thanks so much Tricia x
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Marie,
I dito the responses above. Kim you are right, your sisters get it and join you in prayers for peace of mind and celebration of healthy breasts. Hugs!
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thank you my dear xxx
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Hope all goes well for you!
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Thanks Dr Attai..and thanks for the continuing support you show me!
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Marie,
Loved your cartoons.
I understand all-too-well the feelings stirred up by having a mammogram. It’s a tightrope. I recommend bringing tools that will help you cope. I brought things to sketch, relaxing music to listen to, a good book, etc. Distractions are helpful.
I wish you all the luck in the world.
Sending cyberhugs,
Beth
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I have some work to take with me 😉
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I just got back from a women’s retreat and just read this post. Oh Marie, I so remember those times when I had to get a mammogram. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Beth is right: distractions are very helpful and I love her suggestions. Something that might make you laugh could also be therapeutic as you wait.
XOXO,
Jan
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Thank you xxx
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I hope all goes well with your squishing tomorrow. The anxiety I had at the first mammogram after my chemo ended was heightened when they came in and told me they found something suspicious and wanted to do an ultrasound. I sat and worried myself sick in the 30 minutes it took for them to take me back again. I only had my left breast removed and in that short time I convinced myself that something new had been found in the right one. As it turned out, the questionable spot turned out to be where the scar was from having my lymph nodes removed during the initial lumpectomy.
Sending thoughts of peaceful sleep your way.
Alice
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Oh Alice I understand that one! Thanks for reaching out x
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Virtual hugs of the non-squashing kind dear!
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thanks Martine x
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Best of luck Marie with the mammogram. It’s good to acknowledge the fears, express them and then not dwell too much on it. Thinking of you – we’re all with you.
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I thought of you this morning as I walked on past your work place Deirdre…I really have to make time for lunch with you! Thanks for your good wishes x
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Best of luck, Marie – I hope the trend continues and you get an ‘all clear’ result. I know what you mean about the nerves, but just wait till you hear those great results. Then you can relax again for another year. 🙂
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Have it all behind me now..for another year 🙂
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Marie,
The post cancer tests skew everything in your head. What we may have cavalierly done in the past-even squeezed, (pun? not sure) the appt in between two other far more “important” meetings is forever changed. The mammo is The Event for the day. I’m starting to dislike “new normal” almost as much as “pink ribbons” …. Good luck, my friend.
AnneMarie
xoxo
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